It was a rough day on Monday. I was sick with a bad cough. Isabelle was sick with a cough and the other two were flirting with it. I felt spent before I even got out of bed if that tells you anything. In my brilliant state of mind I decided to work on some Zumba routines. I had a class that evening and the current songs were feeling old and lame. I worked all morning while the kids made a mess. When I finally finished choreographing I was exhausted. Dancing when you have a bad cough is a great combo (nope). One look at the mess the littles had made and I was over the edge. I am not sure if I yelled (statistics would say yes) but I know I cried. A lot. "I don't want to clean this all up./I am so tired./ I just don't feel well and mommies never get a day off!/ I cannot even stop to be sad about this because I have so much to do!/ and the final one I can remember came out as I was pulling wet laundry out of the washer "I basically am a slave" (whoops-drama is in my blood what can I say?)
The sweet kids helped clean up the mess which took a whole of 3 minutes. Isabelle fled to the basement and I got myself together enough to stop crying. Looking in the mirror after incidents like this is never a good idea especially if you get swollen and red at the thought of tears. As I started making lunch and remembering just how good I have it and how gracious God is to me I noticed Isabelle coming up and down the stairs a lot. The basement is freezing this time of year and I thought I must have really unnerved her to make her willing to play down there for a while. I didn't blame her. I felt badly. Then up the stairs she came and handed me this with a hug
and I wanted to cry all over again. More than that big beautiful heart with the words "I love you Mom" got to me was that fact she is able to love someone when they act ugly and sinful. She understands how to forgive so quickly that her first reaction to being treated badly is to offer a huge heart that says I love you. God has been teaching her a thing or two about love that is for sure. Thank goodness we have a Savior because I need him! On good days, on bad days...every single day.
1 comment:
i need Him too, every day.
also... isn't it funny how kids can be our undoing, and also the very thing that brings us back to what's true and good? as much as my kids can get under my skin, I can't imagine where I would be without the lessons they've taught me in the past 5 years.
hugs to you friend.
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